


This Unknown Feeling

by SilversEdge



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Punk, Heathers - Freeform, Implied Sexual Content, Jealousy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 09:41:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15883473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilversEdge/pseuds/SilversEdge
Summary: Based off of Tumblr's ASofterFan's punk universe. What happens when Roman gets the part of JD in the Musical 'Heathers'? Will some feelings come to light that have been unknown until then?





	This Unknown Feeling

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Punk Au](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/413877) by Jude. 



> This is based on asofterfan's punk au. I highly suggest going to check it out. Also, slight nsfw implied scene. nothing graphic. If you've seen the play, its about that.

It was a homework day at Patton’s house and three of the four punks were gathered. Logan and Virgil were bent over their chemistry assignment, a look of concentration across both of their faces while Patton looked to be struggling with his Math, but he didn’t want to ask for help just yet. He was determined to try to do this assignment by himself. Though they were all distracted when the door flew open and a smiling Roman basically flew into the room. 

“You are looking at the new lead male role for the production of Heathers!”

Sprawling over the table to look at his three friends with a grin on his face, he could only make a sound they had taken to calling his offended princey noise as Logan pushed him off the table. 

“Keep yourself off the table, you’re not our homework or our meal.”

“If I were homework, would you do me all night long?” Roman laughed as he got off the floor from where he had rolled, grinning at the others. Virgil was trying not to laugh as Logan just looked at him before sighing. 

“Roman, you’d be done in five minutes then I’d be bored the rest of the time. Now, you said you got a part in Heathers. Are you talking about JD?” 

Patton, who had been putting away his math since he was done with what he could do, just smiled in happiness as he nodded.

“That sounds fantastic Roman. We’ll be front row when you go on!”

“How much do you really know about the character Roman?"

Looking at Virgil, he could see that the man wasn’t paying much attention to him, but was more focused on putting his homework away. Roman didn’t say anything at first but just shrugged as he couldn’t figure out what brought on that question, it seemed a bit… uncharacteristic of him. 

“I’m sure I’ll figure him out. I know the play as a whole, I’ve just never done a character study on him before.” He waved his hand and just moved to sit on the couch with the rest of them.   
Virgil didn’t respond, but he didn’t really see the need to. He just got himself lost in thought, only moving enough when he felt a hand on his shoulder and knew it was Logan’s. 

“Let’s watch a movie, shall we?

It was later in the week when Roman met with Virgil as they were going to add another scene onto their mural that they had been creating. Looking over at the Virgil, he just frowned a bit, setting down a can of spray paint before leaning against the wall behind him.

“Hey Virge… you asked me how much I really know about JD… I mean, I can understand a lot of what he’s thinking… why he murders the people he does... but towards the end. I guess, I’m just not understanding why he just lets himself blow up like that. There was a chance for him to survive. Disarm the bomb, get him to a hospital. They really could have been happy together.”

Virgil just paused in mid can shake as he listened to Roman. Slowly he straightened up and sighed, lowering the can. Turning to look at Roman, he looked to the side as if contemplating what he was going to say. How he could say it without giving away too much of his own thought process, of his history. Dare he reveal to Roman how much he thought he felt he had in common with JD?

“He felt like he didn’t deserve to live Roman. He said it himself, he had never thought of creating, only destruction. From his mother’s suicide, to his father’s business. He spent most of his youth around destruction and trying to numb himself to the pain. Always wanting to be numb so he doesn’t have to face the pain. He’s screaming internally, and no one hears it.”

Moving to sit down, he sighed as he rolled the can from hand to hand, a distraction motion that was more something to just keep his hands busy as he thought, drawing into his own thoughts.

“Veronica had invaded his numbness and brought him out, to all the anger, all the stuff he wanted to have. She became his world, the entire reason for him facing everything he was trying to stay numb to. And she rejected him, brought all the pain home and he couldn’t deal with it. The only way to stop people from hurting her was to kill them all. But she couldn’t let that… he was alone, and he knew how damaged he was, it was something he had been ignoring. So, he knew that she could still have a normal life while he couldn’t. He took the bomb and did the only thing he could to do to end the pain in his heart and let her live the life she should have had from the start. He still loved her, but he knew it couldn’t happen with everything. He let the bomb explode with him."

Roman just listened as Virgil spoke, taking in the one thing he hadn’t thought of for the explanation. Sighing, he moved closer to his companion, unsure what was going on in his brain. All he could do was to really look at Virgil before moving a hand closer to him, not touching him as he knew how much Virgil hated to be surprised with touches.

“Thank you Virgil. I didn’t think of that, but I should have. You’ve helped me learn a new way of seeing into characters behaviors. This will help me a lot.”

Smiling, he pulled back and moved to stand back up. Picking the can up, he stood in front of the mural. “Well, let’s get back to work. I have an early day tomorrow with practices.”

Virgil just nodded and stood up, moving to start spray painting, though he kept a frown on his face the whole time.

“You would have figured it out. You’re smart, you have the raw talent. Give yourself a bit more credit Princey.”

Just humming as he didn’t know what to say with that, Roman just let the hiss of the paint leaving the can lull him into a creative space, letting his mind think over what all he had heard and hadn’t been said.

A few weeks later, it was time for the performance at the theater off of school campus and Patton, Logan and Virgil all had their seats. Virgil just sunk a bit lower in the seat, Patton in the middle looking excited to see Roman preforming on stage, and Logan looking like he was just here because he was dragged. As the show started, they all payed attention, laughing at all the right parts, and then came the part when Virgil almost wanted to cover Patton’s eyes. The music to Dead Girl Walking started playing and Virgil just let out a snicker as he seemed amused by these turn of events. 

“Logan… I get what they’re singing about, but…what are they doing?”

Logan just looked down at Patton, his eye twitching a bit. Not at Patton’s question, but to something he was feeling, though he didn’t have a name for it.

“As with the musical, they’re preforming a simulated sex act on stage.”

“Aren’t they going to like, dim the lights soon?

“No Patton, we get to watch for the song.”

Logan only turned his head back as Patton half hid his face, half watched in embarrassment as the song was coming to a close and Roman and the girl were grinding on each other. After the song was over, Virgil looked over to see Logan’s knuckled white with how he was gripping the chair and how it looked like his jaw was clenched. He was determined that he would figure what that was about later, perhaps during the intermission. 

During the intermission, Virgil approached Logan and rested an arm on his shoulder, eyebrow raised. “Care to tell me what that was about?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about Virgil?”

Rolling his eyes at his friend, he just watched Patton as he bought something to drink from the concession. Turning to look back at Logan, he could see the other thinking in that head of his. 

“Logan, were you jealous?”

Scoffing with the thought, he pushed Virgil slightly so he wasn’t leaning on him anymore, but he didn’t answer the question. After all, how could he answer when he didn’t know the answer himself?

“Let’s get back to our seats, the second half is about to take place and knowing the musical, Roman’s going to outdo himself. 

Straightening his jacket and brushing the blue hair from out of his face, he turned to head back in, ignoring a questioning Patton and a snickering Virgil. 

After the last scene played and the cast took their last calls, the group of three headed out to wait for Roman to leave as they were going to head back together. As soon as he was seen in his normal clothes, Patton launched himself and Roman had his arms full of pastel punk that was smiling and might have had a tear or two glimmering in his eyes. 

“Roman, that was such a good performance, I almost cried at the end! I could feel JD’s pain.”

Just patting Patton on the back, he looked to the others.

“Thanks for the help Virgil, I couldn’t have done it without your help.”

Virgil just shrugged and held a thumbs up as Logan moved to put a hand on Roman’s shoulder.

“You did a good job, you truly do have talent. Though I didn’t know you were proficient in that wide of range of actions for the stage.”

Roman just grinned at him and moved to sling an arm around Logan’s waist as he looked up at him. 

“There’s a lot I’m sure I can teach you, on stage and off.”

And with that, they could only laugh at Logan as he blinked and a slight blush on his face.


End file.
